Peanut Butter Cookie Cake

So it was definitely time for the guys and me to make another epic mealtime (can I get a #FTB?). The first time we made awesome chili nachos with a bacon weave and close to a kilogram of cheese...The second time we made red velvet brownies topped with four packages of cookie and cream chocolate and a can of condensed milk...The third time we made a bowel destroying cookie calzone, which was comprised of basically two packages of barely baked cookie dough and a lot of Reese's Pieces, all jammed together. What did we do this time?

Naturally we went with a dessert again (real food ain't cheap!). After some hasty planning, a shopping list made on the fly, and some interesting cooking ideas we came up with the Peanut Butter Cookie Cake. 

Prepare your insulin levels for a thrill ride. 

So what is the abomination to the left, and more importantly, how do you make it? It is pretty simple and, as usual, fail safe.

Pillsbury Cookie Dough Calzone Recipe - Super Easy!

I had a sleep over with a few friends about a week or so ago (never too old), and whenever we have a sleepover the one thing that must happen is some cooking/experimentation in the kitchen. However, not wanting to spend that much money but to still actually be able to enjoy something tasty, we took some time thinking. What was the result after our meticulous planning (about five minutes)? A $12, ten minute recipe: The Cookie Dough Calzone.

This calzone is probably incorporated into the dreams of every kid who has ever eaten cookie dough straight from the tube before. It is the ultimate sweet-tooth dessert, and since you can stuff anything you want inside of the calzone, the possibilities are endless and any additional cravings one may have can easily be sated. 

Craving Fixes - Peanut Butter Chocolate Oatmeal

Not having food in the house really does cause creativity. Well, perhaps I am being dramatic (we have some food), but the general point is as pantry levels drop, snacking desperation and forced ingenuity seem to increase. But what does one do if a craving strikes? Fat and sugar are things that our body loves, and it is hard to trick our brain into thinking it is having what it really wants.

In the case of the classic chocolate-peanut butter craving, which is perhaps the most merciless of all cravings and usually insatiable, I discovered a decent solution the other day before I was about to resort to eating peanut butter right out of the jar. The answer: OATMEAL! Food of the Gods! (Well not really, oatmeal is generally pretty disgusting in my opinion...just not this time). The following is a simple, quick, yet tasty trick to fix the chocolate-peanut butter craving.

Ingredients:

• Peanut Butter (chunky, smooth, whipped, whatever!)
• Cocoa Powder (as fine as possible, cocaine grade preferably...That chocolate has gotta be a quality product).
• Honey
• Instant Oatmeal Mix (the one you microwave with milk or water)

Detoxification for All!

I suppose the artsy material that I said was coming to this blog will have to wait a little longer, because yesterday I watched such an interesting documentary and a new health wave is sweeping over this household and I believe I should share it (it is my duty!) What might this new healthy living style be? I have already discussed eating gluten free, taking cold showers to increase circulation, stretching for vitality, and post workout ideas to increase muscle gain...What am I chasing after now?

As the title has perhaps given away, the new idea I stumbled across is detoxification of the body, or "detox" for short. Essentially, as the documentary Hungry for Change refreshed for me yesterday, man, as a species, has created so much artificial garbage that every single thing on this planet has been impacted in some shape or form. I can't recall the number, but it was something to the tune of 75,000 chemicals having been created since 1940...or a gigantic number if you prefer to think of it that way.

We know this, or at least intuitively we do. After all, considering the list of ingredients and nutrition information we see every day on the back of food packaging, alarm bells go off inside our head. Twenty letter words we can hardly pronounce, stretching down half the container due to the sheer number of ingredients. It is obvious that something is wrong. The problem however, is that years and years of seeing these labels and never truly understanding them has made this alarm bell system in our head so quiet we don't even hear it anymore. We have been desensitized to what we are being fed by corporations, and we like what we eat. Hence, we generally eat too much, and we eat the wrong things. As the documentary put it, we are overfed but undernourished.

Oatmeal Pancakes with Brown Sugar Glazed Apples and Walnuts

First of all, happy Easter weekend everybody. If you don't happen to celebrate Easter, then happy excuse to have a long weekend (everyone is a winner!) Regardless, it is a long weekend as I stated, and I think it is safe to assume that a long weekend is synonymous with "too much food", and "too much family". I am joking, of course...You can never have too much food.

The following recipe was actually just concocted on the spot this morning, but it was absolutely delicious, fresh, and a great breakfast choice when you feel like something a little special. Read on!

Red Velvet Cookies & Cream Brownies

Ok, stop salivating or carb counting inside your head right now. Regardless of anything you might be thinking as you read this post, despite the excuses you might be making right now, these brownies will be made and they will be made by you, mighty blog reader. And then they will be eaten, and the whole experience will be glorious. This is a fact.

Anyways, enough of that (whatever what I just wrote above is...), I will reiterate my point. I found this recipe on Pinterest the other day, and made the brownies with all haste. Sadly, my Spartan Lifestyle plan is slowly crumbling as of late. I can't take cold showers because I am sick, and I can't really work out since I am recovering from my injury...Naturally I thought some brownies couldn't really worsen the situation so I broke the gluten free rule too (but just for now! I'll be back gluten with a boycott vengeance!)

The brownies themselves were quick and simple to make, fun and different from your average baking recipe, and they were the most delicious brownies I have ever made or eaten. The entire pan of brownies is already gone, and it has only been a few hours, and while my stomach may be in great pain my mind is happy. But enough talk. On to the recipe!

Simple Student Food - Stuffed Pillsbury Crescent Rolls

With exams and summative time approaching, students everywhere are beginning to feel the pressure of all their classes. This obviously included myself, and it is the primary reason I have not posted anything in the last few days (to my great dismay I cannot skip school during this apparently important time.) However, during one of my unsuccessful fridge/pantry raids when I was taking a homework break, I realized that it can sometimes be hard to even know what to eat between study breaks. Just as I was about to forgo eating for the next little while, Pillsbury crescents saved the day. The following is an amazing, tasty, and easy recipe to use during crunch time.

Ingredients:

• Store bought Pillsbury Crescents (the one that comes in the tube. You know!)
• Your favorite deli ham
• Your favorite cheese (no need to get fancy... I like simple mozzarella)
• Green onion, chopped

Note* This is just one of thousands of recipes you can make. Want to make a nutella crescent roll? Go for it! Blue cheese, walnuts, ham, and cranberries? Why not? Almost any flavour combination goes well on bread, and it goes even better when wrapped inside a fluffy crescent. Just experiment with ingredients that compliment each other.

The Steps:

• Unroll crescent mixture from packaging.
• Lay the dough so it is flat  (do this on a baking tray).
• At one end of the dough, spread and sprinkle all of your ingredients. (Tear up the ham and put it there, sprinkle on the cheese, add the green onions. Simple right?)
• Roll up the dough (this will make it so the ingredients are on the inside of the crescents)
• Cut into portions, and bake as instructed. If the ingredients you added may burn or not cook fully, bake based on your judgement.

Totally didn't edit this photo to make the food look better...

And there you have it. Simple but delicious exam food. Cred to the sister yet again for the recipe. Hope if you try this recipe you like it, and if you do, make sure to comment, subscribe, or share with friends. Thanks!

Cranberry Goat Cheese Turkey Crepes with Asparagus and Béchamel

Cranberry turkey goat cheese crepes...You fancy huh? And with asparagus and a béchamel sauce? This sounds too good to be true. Will it take five hours to cook and take thirty pots and pans? Nope. This recipe is actually surprisingly simple, and looks and tastes amazing (not to mention people go crazy when crepes are involved. For some reason everyone thinks they're sophisticated).

Crepe Ingredients!

• 1 package of store bought crepes or make your own crepes (choose from thousands of recipes online, pretty simple).
• 1 bundle of asparagus, cut into 2cm long pieces and washed
• 1/2 cup dried cranberries
• 1 onion, diced (don't you cry now)
• Thinly sliced turkey from your local deli or supermarket. If you don't like turkey use chicken, and if you don't like chicken and are a vegetarian, use that Tofurky stuff that probably tastes horrible.
• 1 package of goat cheese

Béchamel Sauce Ingredients! (This is our recipe, use this or find one online!)

• 3 tablespoons butter or margarine
• 1/4 cup flour
• 1 1/2 cup milk
• 3-4 tablespoons of parmesan (the powdered one).
• Dash of oregano or rosemary, up to you.

The Steps For the Crepes:

• Sauté the onion in a heated pan with 1 tablespoon of oil
• When onion is almost translucent, add asparagus
• While veggies cook, lay out crepes and slather in béchamel sauce
• Lay 2-3 slices of turkey onto each crepe, and sprinkle with some goat cheese and dried cranberries
• When veggies are done, add some to crepes
• Roll up the crepes, and add more béchamel sauce to top if desired
•  Reheat in oven or microwave if need be.  

 For LA SAUCE! (We are zee French).

• In a saucepan, melt the butter on medium heat
• When melted, add the flour and mix well
• When the butter and flour are mixed, add the milk
• Whisk like you have never whisked before
• Wait for the sauce to thicken nicely
• Add cheese and herbs
• When at desired thickness, remove from heat

Note* If the sauce is too liquidy, add flour. If the sauce is too clumpy, add milk. If the sauce tastes disgusting, add butter. If the sauce just tastes like butter, add herbs. This really is fail safe, you just keep throwing things into the pot until it tastes and looks good.
















Fantastique!

Hope you enjoy this recipe, and if you did, make sure to share it with friends, leave a comment, subscribe, or do all of that stuff! Thanks, and cred to the Sister for the recipe.

Quick and Easy Chocolate Cherry Cake

Everyone loves cake... A very, very safe assumption to make. Cake after all, is full of sugar, fat, and all of the things we humans crave (not to mention it is imbued with magical properties). It is used for birthdays, special occasions, or even just as a simple desert to end a meal. Overall, cake is just amazing.

 However! Not all cakes were created equal, and the exact science of baking leaves much room for failure and tears, a simple minute of over baking the difference between a moist, delectable cake or a rock hard slab of flour (a slight exaggeration, granted, but you understand my point). But, fear not internet user, for I am about to impart to you the fail safe but delicious Chocolate Cherry Cake recipe that is sure to wow and impress whoever you serve it to.

As for the ingredients, nothing could be more simple in this cake recipe. All you will need is:

• 1 box of pre-packaged chocolate cake mix (every grocery store has them. Pick your favorite brand).
• Whatever ingredients are on the back of said cake mix box (oil, eggs...the usual stuff. I told you this would be easy!)
• 1 jar of  vanilla cake icing (conveniently sold next to the cake mix to minimize effort and thought process).
• 1 can of cherry pie filling
• Whipped Cream (optional)

The cherries look like that!



It should look like this...
But with the oven door closed!

Then, you will need two circular baking pans. I have never tried rectangular pans and do not know if the one box of cake mix would be enough to cover the pans, but if you are up for trying rectangular, by all means go for it! Prepare the cake mix as instructed on box, and pour half of it into one pan and half of it into the other pan (and lick the bowl. That is the best part of any baking process.) Set to bake as instructed by box (the box knows all).



When the cakes are done, let them cool completely. Once cool, even out the top of one of the cakes with a serrated knife (essentially hack off the top of one of the cakes to make it flat). Place the evened cake down on a plate to serve as the base, ice the sides and top with the vanilla icing, and then pour some of the cherries over top of that. Make sure you don't put too many cherries in the middle of the cake though as that could make it bumpy. And remember, it doesn't have to look perfect, this isn't Cake Boss and this isn't a $2500 overpriced cake.

 When done icing, place the second half and uneven cake on top. Ice that so the entire cake is covered in icing. Then, pour as much of the pie filling cherries on top of the cake as you wish. Let it stand for a while to let the cherry sauce seep into the cake and make it really moist. Then, if desired, decorate the top of the cake with whipped cream. Serve with a glass of milk, and enjoy! Hope you like this recipe, and make sure to share it with your friends if you do or subscribe to this blog! Thanks!

 

Ultimate Nachos

While my parents referred to the nachos my friends and I made as "an abomination", I hold the firm conviction that what we created was not a blatant waste of food but was rather beautiful and delicious. The following will serve as a quick recipe/guide to how you can make the most amazing nachos for any occasion, be it football night, movie night, or just some good chow time.

What You Will Need:

•  3 bags (or two depending on how much you want) of Dorito chips. Chose your favourite flavors, but I suggest one cheese and one jalapeño pepper.
• Store bought chunky chili (1 can)
• Chinese Fried Rice (buy the minute made version, comes in small packets but expands into lots of rice).
• Chunky, mild salsa.
• As much cheese as you can find, we ended up using close to a kilogram (despicable I know).
• Green onion, red peppers, and any other vegetables you want (not necessary of course!)
• One can of cheese wiz (if feeling adventurous, make your own cheese sauce like we did).
• One package of bacon, the more the better.

The Steps:

• Grate all the cheese! DO NOT decide to do this last minute, the salsa will make the nachos soggy if you wait too long.
• Microwave bacon and set aside (or make a bacon weave if feeling adventurous!)
• Prepare all ingredients (cut peppers and onion, prepare stomach for mass consumption of food, etc.).
• On as large a pan as you can find, lay down a sheet of nachos. spread some salsa, some vegetables, and all of the Chinese fried rice. Then add some cheese.
• Add the second layer of nachos on top, and top that with the remaining vegetables, some salsa, all of the chili, and more cheese.
• Add the third and final layer of nachos. Place the bacon on top of the food mountain, and pour the entire jar of cheese wiz over top of it. Take a few moments to think about what you have just done, and then put the child sized monster into the oven to bake until all the cheese has melted and things are nice and crispy. Remove, eat, and enjoy! And if you like this recipe, subscribe to this blog or share this recipe with your friends!

  

                                                                                                        
The Finished Product

  Bacon Weave Skills!

Christmas Dinner! Sweet Potato Ravioli with Bechamel Sauce and Goat Cheese Pear Citrus Salad

Wow, even the name sounds delicious. Compared to the typical roast dinner and potatoes that our family has almost every time around Christmas without fail, it was a major success, and it didn't even take that long. If you are looking for a fresh, but very tasty and filling recipe that will wow your family, this is probably it.